2015-Feb-22, Sunday

thisisdesire: GoddessTara (Default)
The nice folks at West Wind Unitarian Universalist Church have agreed to let me use their building on Saturday, March 14th, from 1-5. This will be more than enough time. I would like to make it a potluck so that there will be plenty of food to be had while we are hanging out and working on the mirrors after the ceremonial portion. Yes, I said mirrors. I have decided that even though this RUHCUS is specifically about me, part of the point is to empower my daughter with the necessary tools with which to address these same issues in her own life. With that in mind I think we should decorate a mirror for her as well. She will be there, along with a couple of her friends, as I think it is important for young people to see this issue being addressed in a positive way. While this project is ABOUT me, it is not only FOR me, because as I become stronger and healthier I also become more able to serve in my community and interact with those I love in a kinder, more compassionate, and ever-more-intentional way.


Now. I am meant to be listing people I would like to be present at this intentionally created event. The who and the why:

Monkey of Mine - My daughter and the absolute love of my life. I can't imagine a single major event without her presence and have no desire to.

Alex - For all of the reasons I am not yet able to mention in this somewhat open forum. I know you will be with me in spirit even if you are unable to be physically present.

Krisna - I think of you as one of my best friends and absolutely want to share this very big and important thing with you.

Maka and Veni - You are my family. There will always be a seat for you at any table I occupy.

Cora - You have opened your home to me and mine and in so doing have made it a sort of spring board and stepping stone for my continued growth, development, and recovery. I am eternally grateful.

Kirsten - Our near instant adoption of each other has enriched my life in so many ways. I want to share all of my things with you, be they extremely important,less important, or absolutely ridiculous.

Bettie Rage - You are a fantastic example of tenacity and growth. You move and inspire me on a regular basis. Being your friend is both an honour and a privilege.

Sara, Brenda, and Debbie - Your ongoing friendship, support, and encouragement are a joy and a comfort. I have shared a great deal of my pain with you and would now like the opportunity to share my experiences of growth and recovery as I move through my personal Hell and come out the other side.

Maya and Orianna - Though I doubt you are reading this personally, I hope that your parents make you aware of how completely fabulous you are in nearly every way. I am so happy that my daughter has had the opportunity to know you both and have fantastically silly and important experiences with you. May you continue to grow together and enrich each others lives.

Susan - You have given me the gift of your time, patience, and wisdom. You are appreciated.

Carol - Your kindness and interest in my overall existence reminds me that I am worthy of such things. Thank you.

Andrea - You suck because you're not coming. Ha! I'm totally kidding. I suppose your daughter's engagement party is a an acceptable excuse for missing this very important life changing event of mine. I look forward to sharing more joyful moments with you.

Rea - Though you may or may not be present, you honour me with your respect and admiration. May I endeavor to deserve it.

Leigh - The fact that you see something worthwhile in me makes me feel good about who I am because I know that you don't care for most people. It's nice to feel special. I'm rather fond of you.

Adrian - I love you more than flavored condoms and cartoon mice! You have had a profound effect on my life. Get a house already so we can mail ourselves to you and get back to the business of doing amazing things together!

Kevin - You are lovely and kindred. That is all.

Jasmine - We don't know each other well, but you have been nothing but kind to me and I think this sort of thing should be shared with as many people as possible. Thank you for your continued support.

Sarah - You are a seriously hardcore force of nature. Thank you for sharing your stories and for taking an interest in me.

Well, I meant to get into some rather serious shit in this post, but am now feeling very much like an Oscar winner who has prattled on for so very much longer than necessary. Meh. There is always tomorrow.

Please let me know if you will be able to attend! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

Over and out.

Step 3

2015-Feb-22, Sunday 09:57 pm
thisisdesire: GoddessTara (Default)
We now return to our regularly scheduled programming already in progress.

Step 3-Living in your RUHCUS in community.

17. Using the answer from question 10 and questions 3 and 4, create action goals for your RUHCUS project. They should be concrete and based in behaviors and actions, things you will DO over the next 30 days. Whenever possible try stating your goals in a positive i.e. Rather than "I will not talk poorly about my belly," you would write "I will speak positively about my belly for the next 30 days"

1. I will sit with my daughter and make lists of the things that we like about our bodies and tape them to the mirror so that we can see them every day.
2. I will move toward situations that make or have made me feel uncomfortable or less than in order to face my fear and teach myself that this is not the case.
3. I will watch positive body image videos and spoken word with my wonderful offspring.
4. I will take at least one picture of myself everyday and post them with my blogs as often as I am able.
5. I will say only positive things about my body unless I am discussing thoughts I am working through throughout this process, especially when in the company of other people.
6. Whenever I happen past a mirror I will say something kind or loving or blow myself a kiss.
7. When I am given a compliment I will smile and say thank you, rather than countering with something disparaging or dismissing it outright.
8 I will speak out against any form of body shaming I encounter regardless of who it's directed at or why. I will be kind, firm, and direct.
9. Whenever I catch myself having negative thoughts about my body, I will interrupt the thought and replace it with something kind and loving.

18. List 3 methods you can use to share your RUHCUS with the larger community.

1. I will blog about my experiences with unflinching honesty at least 4 times a week.

I am leaving the last two blank as I am honestly unsure of how else to go about sharing this. I am absolutely open to suggestions. :)

19. How often will you share your RUHCUS here?

I am saying at least 4 times a week, at minimum. However, I intend to exceed that as often as possible. I believe that transparency is a vital part of this project as it promotes accountability and strengthens my personal connections and ties to my community.

My RUHCUS start date is:

I was so anxious to begin this process that I sort of jumped the gun. I'm pretty sure I was meant to have all of the answers to these things written out and the ceremony all planned out before I ever started the process of documenting and sharing. So, I suppose it actually started February 16th. However, in the interest of being thorough, I intend to carry on for 30 days from the completion of this post.

From here on out things will be a lot less formal. I expect good days and bad and honestly look forward to both.


thisisdesire: GoddessTara (Default)

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